Shadow on the Wall of Your Mind
The Shadow on the Wall of Your Mind
A look at the Other side of teenage depression
Kate Ringland and Ellie Ringland
   
Reviewed by Barb Radmore

"This is my freak,
this is my fear,
my time to scream,
alone in fear..."

The Shadow on the Wall of Your Mind is a powerful look into the chaotic world of teenagers. It is tough enough to survive those traumatic years even without the added stress of mental illness. Two cousins have taken an outstandingly courageous step in sharing their struggles as seen through their poetry. In hauntingly strong, vivid detail their words explore and attempt to explain the pain, confusion and even glimpses of hope that comes with their burdens of depression and bipolar disorder.

It is impossible to describe poetry without including examples. But choosing appropriate representations from this compilation was difficult. Each poems seems to have been painstakingly selected to portray the sentiment it embodies. It is only a hope that they will continue to share their journey in either future published works or perhaps, at least, on their web site.

This book of poetry is divided into two sections. Each begins with a note to the reader from the author of that section. The authors clearly express the power of writing as a means of self expression; the book itself shows the might of writing to educate others.  The first is from Kate Ringland, a young woman who has dealt with the effects of teenage depression for many years.  In her foreword she states "When my mind is full and my thoughts are racing. sometimes when I write it all down, it can help me figure things out. I've stopped running from my problems, and when there's nothing else, I can still write."
    This piece im  missing
this release i drive for,
my scream, it kills them,
the nails scrape til bone,
and i,
fall all into shards.

 The second section is written by Ellie Ringland, Kate's cousin, who looks at life as a teenager with bipolar disorder. In her foreword she describes the need to have someone who will honestly communicate with teenagers to ease their sense of aloneness. She also directs her words to others who may feel hopeless and alone.  "Writing gave me the ability to sort through my own emotions and find hope for the future...Something must be dine to help them regain hope. I used writing to do this."   
Let me alone, ghost that haunts me
Free me from your icy cold grasp
The more I move the tighter your grip
You hurt my inner most core
You show me a pain I don't want You tempt me, but I try to be loose
ago now, be gone
I don't need you, I have me.

These are both extremely talented women. And we are fortunate that they have ventured from the safety of writing for their own benefits to exposing their feelings, fears, hearts and souls to the rest of us. As a voice for both teenagers and sufferers of mental illness they should be loudly heard by teenagers, parents, teachers and others.

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